You must have been troubled by when to say"I love you"because it is one of the greatest puzzles in our life.
What if you say it first and your partner doesn't love you back?Or if they do say it but you don't feel they mean it?Being the first to declare your love can be nerve|rackingand risky and can leave you feeling as vulnerable as a turtle with no shell.But is the person who says it first really in a position of weakness?Doesn't it pay to hold back,play it cool and wait until the other half has shown their hand first?
"A really good relationship should be about being fair and being equal,"says psychologist Sidney Crown."But love is seldom equal."All relationships go through power struggles but,he says,
if a love imbalance continues for years,the rot will set in."That feeling of'I've always loved you more'may be subvertedfor a time,but it never goes away completely and it often
emerges in squabbling."In love,at least,the silent,withholding type is not always the most powerful."The strongest one in a relationship is often the person who feels confident enough to talk about their feelings,"says educational psychologist Ingrid Collins.Psychosexual therapist Paula Hall agrees."The one with the upper hand is often the person who takes the initiative.In fact,the person who says'I love you'first may also be the one who says'I'm bored with you'first."Hall believes that much depends on how"I love you"is said and the motivation of the person saying it."Is it said when they're drunk?Is it said before their partner flies off on holiday,and what it really means is'Please don't be unfaithful to me'?By saying'I love you',they really saying'Do you love me?'If so,wouldn't it just be more honest to say that?"Collins agrees that intention is everything."It's not what is said,but how it's said.What it comes down to is the sincerity of the speaker."
1、What is the most important for you to consider when somebody say"I love you"to you?
A.The intention.
B.The place.
C.The time.
D.The determination.
参考答案：A
参考分析：从第三段末考林的话语中可以剖析出来是你的动机决定所有。“关键的不在于说话内容而在于说话的方法。归根到底是说话人的真诚。”
2、What is the main idea of this passage?
A.The importance of"I love you".
B.The meaning of"I love you".
C.The time of saying"I love you".
D.The place of saying"I love you".
参考答案：C
参考分析：这篇文章主要讲述的是说“我爱你”的机会，是采取主动还是处于被动，与说话者的动机。
3、According to the expert,a good relationship should be
A.fair and equal
B.fair and kind
C.powerful and equal
D.confident and fair
参考答案：A
参考分析：见第三段的"A really good relationship should be about being fair and being equal"。
4、In the first sentence the author means that
A.it is easy to say"I love you"
B.it is hard to say"I love you"
C.we have many troubles in our life
D.people usually do not know when to say"I love you"
参考答案：D
参考分析："You must have been troubled by when to say"I love you",because it IS one of the greatest puzzles in Our life."也就是说大家为什么时说“我爱你”而烦恼。
5、In the third paragraph,the phrase"with the upper hand"means
A.being low in spirit
B.having only one hand
C.being active
D.being passive
参考答案：C
参考分析：此题是词义分析，意思是“占了上风”。
参考译文
你肯定过去为什么时说“我爱你”而烦恼过，由于这是大家日常的一大难点。
假如你先说“我爱你”而他们却不回话，或者他们也这么说但你感觉他或她并不是当真，那该如何解决？如你先说爱一个人，会叫人紧张，而且也非常冒险，它会叫你感觉像没了硬壳的海龟那样容易受伤。但先说出口的人真的是处于劣势吗？隐而不宣，冷静地等待，让他们采取主动会更怎么样？
“真正好的男女关系应该是合理平等的”，心理学家悉德尼。克朗说，“但爱情极少是平等的。”所有些男女关系都会有权力的斗争，但。他说，假如爱情失去平衡，那样数年之后就会开始出现问题。…我对你的爱更多'的状况暂时不再继续，但这种感觉却不会消失，且常常会在争吵中出现。“至少在爱情上，沉默含蓄的那类型型并不一直最强有力的。”男女关系中最强大的一方常常是感觉自信能说源于己的感受的人。“教育心理学家因格瑞·柯林斯说。成人性心理治疗学家波拉·霍尔同意说，”占上风的常常是采取主动的人。事实上，先说‘我爱你'的人总是也是先说’我讨厌你'的人。“霍尔觉得，非常大程度上取决于说”我爱你“的方法和说话人的动机。”他们是在喝醉时说的吗？是在他们乘飞机度假前说的吗？而其真正的意思是‘请必须要对我忠诚'？是否表面上说：“我爱你'，而真正想说的却是’你爱我吗？'假如如此，直截了当地说不是更诚实吗？”考林也觉得你的动机决定所有。“关键的不在于说话内容而在于说话的方法。归根到底是说话人的真诚。”
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